Equator

You headed east. I, west.

Every step doubling our distance.

Halfway round the world, we met, eyes questioning.

You stepped from the path, altered your course slightly north.

I continued west, remaining true.

~

This was written for this week’s Trifecta Writing Challenge:
This week we’re asking for exactly 33 of your own words about love gone wrong.  But we’re asking that you not use any of the following words:

love
sad
tears
wept
heart
pain

 

 

 

 

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46 thoughts on “Equator

  1. I really love this Kelly – I do!

    But, I do so loathe how it is so often the case that it is “her” (assuming you are the second character in this quest) who remains “true,” when – again – so often in fact, it is exactly the opposite of just that.

    • Thanks, Troy. I am not the “her” who remained true. But I often, not always, find it easier to write from “her” perspective rather than “his.” But who knows? Perception and self-truths are funny things – She may feel she’s remained true to the path, when she’s actually the one who strayed. And what is it, exactly, that she remained true to? Herself? Her goals? Or the relationship?

  2. This is fantastic. I love it for so, so many reasons….the title, the feelings, the unstated insinuations, the metaphor, her resolve in spite of his choices. Just absolutely lovely!

  3. Kelly, this is so beautifully written! And it’s also an important piece of wisdom I’ve tried to impart to my daughter. I’ve seen it time and time again, someone abandoning their own true path in the name of love. Almost always a mistake.

  4. I sat here for a few minutes before commenting to allow these beautifully poignant words to wash over me. Every step doubling our distance hit me. As sad as moving on or missing a great love is, I like that one had the strength ton stay true to his/her course and the other to have to courage to change. This was absolutely stunning, Kelly!

  5. I love the way you have taken this, it feels really original and each word perfectly placed.
    You could also read so much into each line. I’m going to be mulling over this for longer than is acceptable for a sane person.

  6. Pingback: My World: My Poems – From Ashes I Rise | Dibbler Dabbler

  7. Kelly….I love this one so much that I just had to come back and read it again. It is so magnificent! Wanted to let you know instead of just being a silent repeat stalker ;-)

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